Monday, July 30, 2012

Poem: Forget me

Forget me
Just let me fade away
Don't remember me tomorrow
Just think of me today
I'm not worth the time
It's too hard to care
It's not worth the climb
All I am is a spare
So, forget me
Don't dwell on what I've done
Let me set with the moon
But not rise with the sun
I'm over all not seen
I'm orange and grey
Not blue and green
Don't let your memory stray
I'm a little off the path
Who knows how far you'll go
I can't do the math
Forget me, please
Don't hold on
Lose it to the breeze
I'm too far gone
Forgive, forget, and don't think too much
Thoughts and dreams can stay for a while
But memories are just like a crutch
So, forget and smile.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Poem: Why?

Why do I like you?
I honestly don't know
You take my heart and give it a throw
It never gets caught, before it falls
Yet you instantly knock down all my walls
You like playing ping pong with my heart
You've turned annoying me into an art
You make me want to scream and shout
You fill my thoughts with self-doubt
I try not to like you, I really do
But when I say I hate you, it's not true
You bring me to my wits end, and back
You make me feel like I'm about to crack
So, why do I like you?
Someone tell me please

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Poem: Change me

Change me
Shape me
Make me what you want
Modest or a flaunt
Choose my words
Choose my voice
Decide what I say
Choose my face
Choose my eyes
Alter me like clay
I'll be this
I'll be that
I'll be what you need
Change my thoughts
Change my opinions
Plant ideas like a seed
You've change me already
I'll never be the same
Everything's different
All I have is my name

Friday, July 20, 2012

Poem: Us

It's stupid
It's brilliant
It's worst and it's best
It's chaotic
It's organized
It's awake and at rest
It's perfect
It's painful
It's a curse and a blessing
It's rising
It's falling
It's knowing and guessing
It hurts you
It kills me
It makes us feel whole
It's hate
it's love
It's hot and it's cold
We make it
We break it
We fall apart
It's funny
It's serious
It's crazy and it's smart
It's strange
It's normal
It doesn't make sense
I'm broken
I'm fixed
It's relaxed and it's tense
It can break
It can fix
It can make the world quake
You rock the earth when you hug me near
You make me blush when you call me dear
I get you to smile when you want to cry
I make you feel better even if I have to lie
What happens, will happen no matter what we do
Someday it won't be me and you
It will be you and some nameless girl
Who's prettier and seems like a pearl
You'll forget me and not spare a glance
Right now I'm just taking a chance
You might end us first, and I can't bear it
So, right now I'm just gonna quit
That was us, but it won't always be
That can't be changed with just a plea
This hurts me as much as you
Just understand I have to

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Poem: Boundaries Pt. 2

I need to keep my words locked up tight
No matter what they always have to fight
Everything I say seems to comes out wrong
My words are too short or too long
I speak too quietly or too quickly
I try to be kind but it comes out prickly
I mess up on everything that I do
I've finally decided I'm done, I'm through
I'm giving up on even trying
So, I'll just stop with all of my lying
No, I'm not even near okay
All these colors just fade to grey
I have to stay inside the lines
All these things just undermine
I just have to stay silent
My frustration can get violent
I'll just keep my head bowed
Work to blend in with the crowd
I can't deal with this trouble
All my happiness just turns to rubble
I'm falling apart, breaking at the seams
Can really nobody hear my screams?
I just feel like I'm drowning all alone
Nobody saves me and I sink like a stone
Just pull my out, break me free
Comes and save me, then let me be

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Poem: Pick up the phone

You if I needed to I could talk to you, but you aren't picking up the phone.
I just need you.
I need you to tell me not to do it.
I need you to tell me the reason.
The three word reason I'm still here at all.
Why I'm still alive.
Other people tell it to me but it only matters when you say it.
You don't know how big an effect it has.
You don't know that it stops me from.
I don't even have to ask, you always say it.
You've said it to my face, in a note, and in a text.
But you're not texting back now.
Even hello would do, I just need to talk to you.
Please pick up the phone.
I really need you right now.
At least tell me why you're not able to talk to me.
At least tell me what I did wrong.
Please pick up the phone.
I need something.
I have some much falling apart and breaking.
Please tell me I still have you.
I have been trying to fight it and the only thing that keeps me going is you.
I can't fight anymore.
I can't without you.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Poem: Don't

Don't speak it
Don't say it
Pretend it's not true
It's breaking
It's cracking
This is coming unglued
Don't believe it
Don't think it
All's easier that way
It' painful
It's hurting
But it'll be over one day
Don't do anything
Don't say anything
This is all too fresh
It's there
It's permanent
This is imprinted in flesh
Don't remember it later
Don't dwell on the past
It'll just keep you back
It's a prison
It's chains
Your mind could crack
Don't fix it
Don't help it
You'll break too
It's shattered
It's flawed
Thoughts all black and blue
Don't make me remember
Don't let me forget
I need to leave it behind
It's a curse to carry
It's a blessing to hate
It crawls and creeps inside my mind
I can forget and so I will
But right now, my pain could kill.

Friday, July 6, 2012

Poem: Sorry

Just say you're sorry
It's not that hard
Just for once let down your guard
One little word
Five tiny letters
And a gigantic blow to your pride
Just give me a reason
I can stay here all season
Admit you were wrong
It won't take that long
I need something to carry me on
This is the end of the con
Just stop me from this
Yell, whisper, or kiss
I need an excuse
My lies come in twos
Just give me something to hold
Not all that glitters is gold
I need to forgive you
But my reasons are few
Just say you're sorry

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Poem: Games

I fall backwards
You step away
You don't catch me
I'll make you pay
Let's play a game
Whoever wins it
You'll be glad you came
Playing your games
Pretending I don't care
You always cheat
These games are never fair
You're making up as you go along
You don't like my rules
Some are right and some are wrong
Let's play a game
Those are always fun
I'm the moth and you're the flame
It's one battle and a war
We go back and forth
One follows, the other ignores
Let's play a game
It'll be fun
Just ready, fire, aim
Keep going 'till you've won
We both pull out
I win, you lose
And there you pout
I've followed all my cues
Let's play a game
I'm having fun here
Who's to blame?
Let's give a cheer
We hear the winners name
I played your games
You played mine
We both have some claims
Just count down from nine
It's over.
I've won.
Although I guess we're even
When it's all said and done.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Poem: Boundaries

I have to be careful with words
They're flitting in my head like a bunch of birds
I say the wrong thing way too often
The looks, leers and chills never soften
I have my boundaries but I forget they're there
Sometimes they might as well be made of air
Other times I crash up against the wall
I walk too proud and then come to a crawl
My own insecurity always holds me back
Other peoples word are all light and mine are pitch black
I talk too much and they tell me to I shouldn't
I talk too little and they say I couldn't
Is it walls or chains?
Do I lose or gain?
I'm stuck in my head and they stuff me back inside
I do something wrong and I just want to hide
I'll stay silent as I can, keep my head down
When they all smile, I'll have a frown
Are they laughing at me?
Is my pain and sadness a source of their glee?
I ignore them and push out what they say
One deep breath and take it day by day
I have my boundaries and I have to respect them
Otherwise I'll be up until two am
I have my chains and I'm not supposed to try and break free
Close my eyes, one, two, three
Here's my line, I can't go to the other side
I can't, after all I've cried
I'm stuck in this place
A prison of glass, where I hide my face
I can't break through
I look fine outside, but on the inside I'm blue
I'll watch what I say
I'll do everything your way
I have my boundaries and I need them all
Over and out of the boundaries I could fall
I don't want to break out
I don't want to scream or shout
I don't want to be helped by you and yours
You've fought enough of your own wars
I'll be more careful next time
I'll hold my tongue like speakings a crime
I know where the line is now
I'll be silent, that I vow.